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Spot on, 1.10pm.

'My name is John Smith and I live at 1 Albion Avenue. My date of birth is 1.1.1965 and I am a Morris dancer.

I have been asked to make a statement about a road traffic collision I witnessed at lunchtime on 5.5.2015. I remember it was lunchtime, because I had just enjoyed a brown Windsor soup and haslet salad at Eunice Frobisher's Tea Rooms.

I recall that it had been raining, as I remember getting home to regret having left my pinstripe bathing suit out to dry. Really though, it was very warm for the time of year, and so I mustn't grumble.

I had not had any alcohol, though the previous night I did have a small glass of dry sherry when the vicar popped round to discuss the Village In Bloom competition. The azaleas this year really are a tremendous success, though I must say that Colonel Cholmondley's delphiniums are a real triumph.

As I was standing on the pavement waiting to help a little old lady across the road, a gentleman I now know to the Claimant walked up to me and inadvertently trod on my foot. I apologised to him, and then watched as he walked into the road...'

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