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The Mitchell Survival Guide

Most advice I have seen proferred since the enormity of Mitchell became apparent, particularly from the Judiciary, has been rather bland, emphasising the need to operate efficient diary systems, comply with court directions and make early applications etc etc. In other words numbskull stuff that’s not much use to the poor grunts sent out on patrol in the jungle.

How has this all come about? Apparently the ‘Singapore’ experience, where they operate a merciless ‘one strike and your out’ system. How this typically oriental mode of justice came to be a model for reform for this jurisdiction, your guess is as good as mine, but I just work here. So how is a green horn to survive his first tour of duty in the Nam and avoid being fragged by Charlie?

1.Fight dirty- its kill or be killed out there. Learn to hate the opposition. It will make what you have to do easier.

2. Agree nothing- diplomacy is over, and war is the last form of diplomacy.

3. Set killing zones- most District Judges have little interest in individual cases and can be easily manipulated to set a series of lethal directions at the case management stage. The best directions currently are ones without a sanction- the so called ‘booby trap’ directions that currently have the same killing force as the signposted variety.

4. Use a point man. A paralegal is good, entrusted with administering diary systems on the promise of a training contract. They can draw enemy fire in the event of an ambush, allowing you to take cover. Cover your own butt!

5. Call in airstrikes. Its comforting to know you can napalm the whole jungle floor if things get sticky. Its not easy I know, but try and act only for clients with deep pockets.