Gift of goodwill Returned to the office to find that your Christmas gifts have gone down like the Euro on a bad day? Then listen to the Rodent, the anonymous commentator on the profession, writing in Professional Marketing magazine.

A lousy gift can devastate your career, he warns; a good one can make it.

Key moves include ignoring the junior assistant who worked so hard on your deal - he cannot help advance your career.

For the head of department, it is best to buy an awful present and send it under the name of a hated rival.

'If you execute this properly, the gift will be so embarrassing that the partner will never even mention it and thus it will never be denied.' And finally, do not skimp on your secretary's present.

One problem though: you really can't send your secretary out to buy it.