‘Quite frankly, I don’t have all that many clients who call me sweetie.’ That was solicitor Frank Presland’s explanation of why he accepted the job as Sir Elton John’s business manager. It’s a sentiment with which Obiter can sympathise. But then there is much in Ronald Irving’s anthology of legal quotations, The law is a ass, that rings a responsive bell. Take this proverb from the French novelist Honore de Balzac (1799-1850): ‘Laws are spider webs through which the big flies pass and the little ones get caught.’ Or Lord Evershed (1899-1966) doubting a contract’s fairness: ‘This contract is so one-sided that I am astonished to find it written on both sides of the paper.’ And this little gem on being a member of the judiciary: ‘Being a judge is the best career in the world. One is never contradicted, one is never interrupted and one always has the last word.’ (Mr Justice Vaisey, 1877-1965.) The revised version of The law is a ass is to be published by Duckworth in September 2010.