Only in America, part 792: an ex-lawyer surpassed the previous high watermark for 'courtroom chutzpah' last week when she sued for $100 million because she had not been warned that lying while giving a sworn testimony could result in criminal perjury charges. The one-time in-house counsel argued that by telling her only of 'possible sanctions', such as censures and fines, her fifth amendment right against self-incrimination, as well as her right to due process, had been violated - she was convicted of perjury and disbarred. The judge, unsurprisingly, gave her claims the shortest of short shrift, describing them as having 'gossamer durability'. He referred to a case in 1974, when the judge had said: 'When the apocryphal child murdered his parents and then sought mercy as an orphan, he set a standard for courtroom chutzpah that has not been rivalled until the filing of this lawsuit.' In the present case, given that the ex-lawyer was an experienced practitioner and had been accompanied by an experienced defence counsel when she gave her evidence, the judge considered that her chutzpah had reached an even higher level.