IN A REMARKABLE STROKE OF LUCK, A WORMHOLE IN THE SPACE/TIME CONTINUUM OPENED LAST WEEK AND INTO NEIL ROSE'S LAP FELL A COPY OF A LETTER TO READERS FROM THE GAZETTE'S EDITOR IN THE LAST ISSUE OF 2103

After a year of great celebrations to mark the Gazette's bicentenary - and who will ever forget that Jupiter fly-past by the UN Space Corps? - it is now time to reflect on how far the profession has come and where it is going as we head into another 100 years of covering legal news.

And what a difference a century makes.

Flicking through the archives of the Gazette's centenary in 2003 - hard to believe, but they were still using paper then, rather than mind-chips - it would seem that some people were concerned at the time that there were too many lawyers.

But ever since Court TV succeeded in its audacious takeover bid for the BBC in 2018, the profession has been on an incredible upswing.

We should be proud that one in five of the world's population now has a legal qualification, making the Gazette the most widely read hourly e-paper in the United States of Europe, Africa and the Middle East.

And we are in a robust financial state too, our income boosted by the popularity of the top-rated Internet programme and vote for who should be the day's 'Lawyer in the news' - at a mere $500 per minute for those logged on to our site.

In this context, it is gratifying if hardly a surprise that the Gazette bicentenary awards eclipsed the Oscars as the most prestigious event on 2103's global entertainment calendar.

And I must take one final opportunity to congratulate Geoffrey Bindman for his astonishing achievement last November in winning his second lifetime achievement award for human rights work, exactly 100 years after his first.

His dedication to fighting for the rights of the cryogenically preserved more than justifies his decision all those years ago to join their ranks.

I have uncovered from the archives a popular joke in the 1990s about the future of the solicitor's office being a computer, a dog and a solicitor: the computer to do the legal work, the dog to keep the solicitor away from the computer, and the solicitor to feed the dog.

Of course, computers now do virtually all the work and the Non-Human Rights Act 2098 granted full rights to all non-human equals - I would remind correspondents that it is frowned on in the current climate to call them animals - meaning dogs jealously guard the right to feed themselves.

So the question arises as to what role the solicitor has at all going forward.

Fortunately, there are some areas of practice where it is simply not economic to use computers when there are organic resources available.

Perhaps the greater question is the future of men in the profession.

The Association of Male Solicitors last year marked the 90th anniversary of women becoming the majority of the solicitors' profession with a somewhat undignified riot down Chancery Lane, arguing that parental laws were drafted in an era when men could not have babies.

Fortunately, with so few male solicitors left, hardly anyone noticed them.

However, it helps all solicitors that the corporate market is hotting up like never before, and firms are facing up to the task admirably.

Clifford Chance, the galaxy's largest law firm, this week becomes the first alien practice to take a chance and open an office on Alpha-Centuri.

Others have held back from such a move, fearing that competition from the local profession would be too strong - Alpha-Centuri lawyers have the great advantage of eyes on both sides of their heads, allowing them to handle and bill for two different matters at the same time.

Clifford Chance also hit the headlines for taking over the rest of what was once called London for new office space, having finally outgrown Canary Wharf even after its tower was extended into the stratosphere.

Asda & Overy won plaudits last month for the bold step of grafting cybernetic implants on to all of its assistants, thereby ensuring they have the capacity to meet the challenging but far from impossible billing target of 8,395 hours a year - a mere 23 hours a day - leaving plenty of time to enjoy the holographic playsuites installed in its luxurious new offices on the dark side of the Moon.

As we look forward to the next 100 years, there are some major decisions to be made.

It would appear that the Law Society Council will eventually give its backing to multi-species partnerships (MSPs), despite ongoing concerns about the different approaches to the practice of law between humans and some of our friends from the other side of the Milky Way.

The Klandori, the species at the heart of the controversy over MSPs, argue that it is impossible for a telepathic race such as theirs to maintain client confidentiality, and that it would be discriminatory to exclude them.

However, there is still no sign of an end to the deadlock on whether to drop the ban on paying referral fees.

Still, there was relief that agreement has finally been reached on capping contingency fee levels at no more than 98% of damages.

Consumer groups hailed it as a victory for clients.

At the other end of the scale, the exodus from legal aid work continues.

There are now just three practices left in the solar system that will handle legally aided divorce work, which has caused an outcry on Saturn, where the law demands that every woman has 18 husbands - one for every day of the Saturn week.

As a result, the courts there are now having to deal with some tricky conflict of interest problems.

It seems likely that they will follow the example of Earth, albeit some 95 years later, and do away with conflict rules altogether.

Meanwhile, conveyancers are confronting the huge threat posed by the introduction of compulsory HIPs (home information palmcards).

These mean that when buyers and sellers literally shake on a deal, all relevant property and financial information is instantly downloaded to CompuConveyancer(tm).

It then mind-mails back an analysis within seconds to both parties, so they can agree either to complete or pull out.

Other fields of the law are also going through major changes.

The bar has launched a campaign against the new cadre of virtual judges, arguing that they are not 'good chaps' because they have not racked up a single dinner at any of the inns between them.

In response, the government says an expanded judiciary is necessary to cope with the increase in litigation expected after the courts' jurisdiction was extended to encompass all arguments, including pub disputes over football trivia and contested words in Scrabble.

The latter should prove to be a lucrative area of work - if the words are on double or triple word scores, lawyers' fees will be multiplied accordingly.

In addition, the legal system is coming to terms with the news that the preserved brains of our leading judges, which have served the nation so well in the Supreme Court for the past century, are beginning to decay.

There is particular concern about the brain of the Master of the Rolls, Lord Phillips of Worth Matravers, which has apparently been addled by 104 years of daily demands for guidance on costs issues.

The government now estimates that it will be able to abolish the post of Lord Chancellor by 2145, once all the constitutional issues have finally been sorted out, while it should shortly announce the results of its investigation into whether the QC mark should be reinstated.

Many have seen this as a belated recognition that the decision a century ago to designate leading advocates as FCs (Falconer's Counsel) may have been hubristic.

All in all, the profession enters the Gazette's third century in good heart, especially as it now looks certain that Parliament will back our bicentenary campaign to change the national anthem to a song as true as it is classic: 'I fought the law and the law won.'