Court gossipingAny litigator may think, when a district judge lifts a pen to make a note, that the judge has made a point which is worth jotting down.

But in fact, there is every chance that the solicitor is about to be entered in the gossip columns of the Association of District Judges' Law Bulletin.

The magazine is filled with numerous examples of the profession's illiteracy in pleadings, such as a trial bundle entitled 'Particles of claim'; 'The contents of this defence believes that the contents of this defendant are true'; and 'The respondent suffers mood swings and a jackal and hide personality'.

But even better are daft court exchanges, such as:'What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?''He said, "Cathy, where am I?"''And why did that upset you?''My name is Susan.'And Obiter's favourite:'Do you recall the time that you examined the body?''The autopsy started around 8.30pm.''And Mr Dennington was dead at the time?''No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.'