Hibs fix it for Jim

Scottish football has reached such a parlous state that Premier League club Hibernian was recently forced to turn to the 55-year-old practice administrator at Wokingham law firm Clifton Ingram for help.

Many arrogant English fans may believe this to be true, but actually Edinburgh-born Jim Paterson (below) won a competition on the club's Web site which saw him enjoy a VIP day out at the city derby fixture against Hearts and compete at half-time against three other winners in a Carlsberg 'Field of Dreams' soccer skills tournament.

Mr Paterson - who confesses to having scored many a vital goal for Hibernian in his dreams - juggled the ball, waltzed around cones, and hit the back of the net twice to run out the winner in front of 13,000 fans.

A somewhat overly emotional Jim told Obiter: 'It may take a long time, but if you dream hard enough, you never know - it may come true.'