Sweet revenge

Thanks to an anonymous solicitor in Cardiff for supplying us with the complete version of the perfect revenge which we featured recently (see [2001] Gazette, 15 February, 12), supposedly of a well-known Wall Street broker: 'To my wife, I leave her lover and the knowledge that I wasn't the fool she thought I was.'To my son, I leave the pleasure of earning a living.

For 35 years, he thought the pleasure was mine.

He was mistaken.'To my daughter, I leave $100,000.

She will need it.

The only good piece of business her husband ever did was to marry her.'To my valet, I leave the clothes he has been stealing from me for the past ten years.

Also the fur coat that he wore last winter at Palm Beach.'To my chauffeur, I leave the cars.

He almost ruined them and I want him to have the satisfaction of finishing the job.'And lastly, to my partner, I leave the suggestion that he take some other man in with him if he expects to do any business.'