The government has announced that we are to have a very hot summer this year.

I hear that sources within the Department of the Environment have indicated that if the weather does not produce a hot summer this year, then they will be instituting a commissioner for weather affairs to deal with the weather's appalling record in client care. Unspecified consumer groups have welcomed the government's move and commitment to clamp down on 'fat cat' clouds, growing in a completely unmerited fashion and spoiling everyone's day.


Tim Melville-Walker, MacDonald Oates, Petersfield, Hampshire